12 July
A.D. 2003
archives
NEWLY UPDATED
Please Stand By
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Masterpiece Chat Room Presents
Hello, Dillard!
Since my good friend Catie thinks the updates at the Cuparium are not as timely as they ought to be, I decided to take a cue from her site and post a fragment of a conversation from Internet Relay Chat. Catie and I were notorious co-conspirators at #Books-NetCafe, and on this occasion Catie (Spookster14) dropped in under a new nickname (DillardB-) unfamiliar to the other regulars. Without preparation or mutual consultation, we thought we would see how it played out if I treated her as a new visitor. This episode is from 20th February 2000...
*** DillardB- has joined channel #Books-NetCafe
MerlinCCC: hi there DillardB- .. welcome to Books NetCafe
DillardB-: Hello Hello..
Cuparius: Hello, Dillard! How may I be of assistance???
DillardB-: Hm..
Cuparius: Dillard! May I interest you in some...bananas, perchance?
MerlinCCC: so how are you doing tonight DillardB- ??
DillardB-: Mmm.. Bananas..
Cuparius offers the worthy Dillard some bananas
DillardB-: I don't know.. last time I bought bananas, they were infested with spiders..
Cuparius: That can be a problem, Dillard
Ellexists: Bitter or better..That's my motto..I pick better
DillardB-: One of them laid eggs in my esophagus
Cuparius: Although...
Cuparius: LOL
Cuparius: As I was saying..
*** CCChloe has joined channel #Books-NetCafe
CCChloe: heya folks!
MerlinCCC: hi there CCChloe .. wb
DillardB-: Hello, CCChloe
Ellexists: Bye Merlin...Thanks for humoring me
CCChloe: Cuparius!! :)
Cuparius: Although, spiders infested with *bananas* are far worse!
Cuparius: (((((((((((((((CCChloe)))))))))))))))!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MerlinCCC: *grin* .. it WAS sort of fun Ellexists ..
*Spookster14 Can you believe the nick DillardB is actually registered? lol
Ellexists: :o)
MerlinCCC: well .. I'm going to head out .. you all have fun .. see ya next time
MerlinCCC: bye
Ellexists: bye
*** MerlinCCC has left channel #Books-NetCafe
CCChloe: :D
DillardB-: Spiders infested with bananas?? Unheard of!
--> Spookster14 LOL
DillardB-: I won't believe it!
Ellexists: Dillard's no dullard I see
Cuparius: Oh, it's true, all right...
Cuparius: How are you, tonight, CCChloe?
CCChloe: *chuckles*
Ellexists: Hey Mr Talley man ..tally me bannana
CCChloe: Cuparius: juuuust peaCCChy ;)
Cuparius: Hurrah!
Ellexists: njjo went to Jamaica
Ellexists: mjjo
Cuparius: Aso
Ellexists: She told us all about it
Ellexists: CCC knows
Ellexists: Chloe was here before Merlin
Cuparius: Dillard, I believe I saw a spider infested with an entire *bunch* of bananas just yesterday
Ellexists: she gets 2 shifts today
*** chirodropid (pirch@proxy12.talkcity.com) has joined channel #Books-NetCafe
DillardB-: Wow..
CCChloe: yups hehe
CCChloe: I heard all about it ;)
Cuparius: Greetings, chirodropid
chirodropi: hi
Ellexists: I can't shake the image of Jamaican beaches and jungles
Ellexists: dream come true for me
CCChloe: heheheh Ellexists
Ellexists: hi chi
CCChloe: Honestly though - I really want to go to siberia sometime hehehe
Ellexists: Well, I'm going to go eat dinner, now bbl
DillardB- glances over at Ellexists..
CCChloe: kk Ellexists
Ellexists: bye
*** Ellexists has left channel #Books-NetCafe
CCChloe: LOL I get to go to bed at midnight, up again at 3.30 am to go to a diner with a friend, and then back to bed till 9 ROFL
Cuparius: The other day on the banana boat, as I was drinking vinegar and dreaming of my home in fair Gary, Indiana, I happened upon a nest of rare blue-throated warbling banana spiders
chirodropi: ???
Cuparius: They were lovely specimens
Cuparius: They have the most beautiful songs
DillardB-: Gaaaary, Indiana..
chirodropi: SOUTH AMERICAN banana spiders?
Cuparius: Especially during mating season
CCChloe: oh my... Cuparius LOL
DillardB-: LOL
Cuparius: South American blue-throated warbling banana spiders, to be exact
chirodropi: or birds?
DillardB- scratches his head..
Cuparius: I was in a reverie listening to their hauntingly beautiful calls, until one of them flew at me and started biting my neck
DillardB-: Oh no!
DillardB-: You know.. I had a similar attack once.. only it was a pigeon..
DillardB-: And I now have a glass eye..
Cuparius: It's amazing how such a tiny, lovely creature can cause such excrutiating pain
Cuparius: Pigeons are the worst
Cuparius: excruciating, I meant to type
CCChloe: Pigeons?
chirodropi: sorry 'bout that
Cuparius: Pigeons pack the wallop of a .44 without the beautiful calls
DillardB-: I love my glass eye.. Sometimes when I get bored.. I will switch it for one of my more "interesting" ones..
Cuparius: Ah...
DillardB-: I had the pigeon stuffed
DillardB-: and it is now hanging on my wall
Cuparius: Excellent idea!
Cuparius: Serves it right!
Cuparius: Filthy creatures, they are
Cuparius: And cannibals, too
CCChloe feels like she'sin #Surrealism
Cuparius: Not that there is anything wrong with cannibalism, of course
chirodropi: hmm..I'm due back on the planet Earth in 5 min
DillardB-: Oh no... nothing at all wrong with it..
DillardB-: I enjoy the occassional human as much as the next guy!
CCChloe: yups... definitely in #surrealism
CCChloe: LOL
Cuparius: No, pigeons are clearly Dadaists, not Surrealists. You can see it in their work. Dada here. Dada there. They Dada everywhere
Cuparius: I hate stepping in their Dada on the way to work
DillardB-: lol
CCChloe: ROFL!!!
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*** chirodropid has left channel #Books-NetCafe
DillardB-: I keep a large supply of stones in my coat pocket.. Just incase I see one of the little monsters
*** tkzak has left channel #Books-NetCafe
Cuparius: Dillard, have you ever replaced your glass eye with one of those superball things? Or a snow dome?
DillardB-: You know.. I haven't tried that!
Cuparius: Stones. Good idea, Dillard.
Cuparius: Snow domes are great for a wide variety of things
DillardB-: grapes fit in there good..
DillardB-: I like grapes..
Cuparius: Oooh! Grapes!
Cuparius: Mmmmmmmmmmm
DillardB-: Almost as much as.. bananas..
CCChloe: grapes of wrath?
Cuparius: Bananas of pain
CCChloe: ROFL not going there
DillardB-: I have this little skull.. You know, the kind that comes from those tiny little skeleton models.. It fits in there nicely. I like watching the little children run, screaming..
*** BeanieHalo (BeanieHalo@proxy16.talkcity.com) has joined channel #Books-NetCafe
Cuparius: Sometimes, when I'm tired of being pecked to death by large rodents wearing false noses and moustaches, I retreat to my little snow dome in the country
BeanieHalo: Hiya Folks! BeanieHalo and Nikkiebear invite you to join #ChatCafe` ! We chat about anything and everything! Such as our relationships, our lifestyles, and of cousre our shopping life! lol So come on in and join da party! Remember #ChatCafe`
DillardB-: I don't want to know about BeanieHalo and Nikkiebears relationships..
CCChloe stifles a giggle
Cuparius: LOL
CCChloe: are BeanieHalo and Nikkiebear pigeons?
BeanieHalo: lol
Cuparius: I have a very interesting lifestyle/relationship with fructarian arachnids, BeanieHalo
*** BeanieHalo has left channel #Books-NetCafe
Cuparius: Gee
CCChloe: HAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
CCChloe: sorry
Cuparius: Gee whiz, even
Cuparius: LOL
CCChloe: I was trying not to laugh with them still in the room
CCChloe: LOL
Cuparius: Heh heh heh heh heh
CCChloe: sometimes people are just too much
Cuparius: Gotta get me to #ChatCafe` and QUICK!!!!!!!!!
Cuparius: j/k
CCChloe: LOL!
DillardB-: Go there... it's funny lol
Cuparius: Have you been there? Are you there now?
DillardB-: They don't say hello to you, though
CCChloe aint goin there
*** b-nuts1 (b-nuts@proxy6.talkcity.com) has joined channel #Books-NetCafe
DillardB-: Oooh
CCChloe: b-nuts1!!!!
b-nuts1: hi
DillardB-: never mind lol
CCChloe: how long has it been, stranger?
Cuparius: (((((((((((((((((b-nuts)))))))))))))))))
DillardB-: BeanieHalo has kicked you from #ChatCafe` (EWWWw)
b-nuts1: {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{chloe}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
CCChloe: DillardB-: Whatever *did* you do? LOL
Cuparius: ROFL
DillardB-: Nothin.. lol
b-nuts1: {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{cup}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
CCChloe: (((((((((((((((((( b-nuts1 )))))))))))))))))))))))
Cuparius: Yes! Tell! Now!
b-nuts1: cup just sent you something hopeyou get it
Cuparius: Tell, or I'll throw a tantrum!!!!
DillardB-: I just told them that sometimes when I'm bored, I like to take my pet rooster outside and watch him run around while I chase him with an axe..
CCChloe: ROFL!
Cuparius: ROFL
b-nuts1: lol
CCChloe: Gee, even *I*, the Queen of Kicks wouldn't kick for that LOL
DillardB-: Hm..
Cuparius: LOL
Cuparius: Thanks, ((((((((b-nuts))))))))
CCChloe serves everyone some delicious ramen noodles LOL
b-nuts1: yw
DillardB-: Oh thank goodness.. They didn't ban me
b-nuts1: hi dillard
DillardB-: ugh
DillardB-: They don't like me.. *sniffle*
b-nuts1: awwwwwwwwwwwww
CCChloe: DillardB-: You poor baby - here, let me feel sorry for you
Cuparius: Ramen *noodles*??? Hurrah!!! *Hurrah*!!! HURRAH!!!!!!!!!!!
Cuparius: LOL CCChloe!
CCChloe: Cuparius: Its the BReakfast of Champions
CCChloe: or Chloe's anyway
b-nuts1: chloe do that next year lol
*** MRSCPWOLF (MRSCPWOLF@proxy4.talkcity.com) has joined channel #Books-NetCafe
b-nuts1: hi mrs
CCChloe: hey MRSCPWOLF
b-nuts1: ltns
MRSCPWOLF: good evening all
Cuparius: Ramen noodles, such a delicacy...am I...*gasp*...worthy?
Cuparius: LOL
MRSCPWOLF: how is everyone
DillardB-: WE are the Grapes.. of Wrath.. we never take a bath..
b-nuts1: good and u
Cuparius: LOL
CCChloe: Cuparius: Yes, you are. You shall even be served the Sacred Instant Noodle Broth afte the Noodles.
Cuparius: Hello, MRSCPWOLF
DillardB-: It's VeggieTales..
MRSCPWOLF: still here with about three weeks to go.
DillardB-: I got my mother to buy the sing-along video..
b-nuts1: dillard you watch vegie tales
Cuparius is in ecstasy! Cuparius faints!
DillardB-: Of course!
DillardB-: Doesn't everyone???
CCChloe: DillardB-: ummmmmmm who's the singing cucumber?
b-nuts1: only whe grand kids bring the tape over
DillardB-: Larry?
Cuparius lies, "Of course! I watch it, too!"
CCChloe: yeah, Larry!
CCChloe: eheheh he's funny
b-nuts1: mrs 3 weeks????????
DillardB-: Larry and Bob!
MRSCPWOLF: oh please i'm just getting away from barney i don;t need singing veggies
DillardB-: My favorite is the Waterbuffalo song..
CCChloe: ROFL I've heard that!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MRSCPWOLF: befor baby come b-nuts
DillardB-: heh..
b-nuts1: lol i thought that was inthe past too then comes grandkids
b-nuts1: when due
MRSCPWOLF: march 11th
b-nuts1: best of luck and congrats
MRSCPWOLF: now we're into batman and ninja turtles
MRSCPWOLF: thank you
b-nuts1: yw
DillardB-: ..Everybody's got a water buffalo, yours is fast but mine is slow. Oh where'd we get them? I don't know, but everybody's got a water buffalo-ooooooooo....
b-nuts1: wow havent heardof kids playing with them for a while
MRSCPWOLF: what ninja turtles?
b-nuts1: yes
Cuparius: *I* don't have a water buffalo...*sniffle*
MRSCPWOLF: his biggest thing now though is wwf
Cuparius: Not even a bison
b-nuts1: batman i heard of but not the turtles
DillardB-: That is why Archibald doesn't want Larry to sing the song, Cuparius!
Cuparius: Aso des ka...
DillardB-: They said "Stop it, stop, stop right this instant! What do you think you're doing? You can't say everyone's got a water buffalo when everyone does not have a water buffalo!"
Cuparius: LOL
DillardB-: "We're going to get nasty letters saying, "Where's my water buffalo? Why don't I have a water buffalo?""
Cuparius: Yeah!
b-nuts1: lol
DillardB-: So now.. Larry sings, "Everybody's got a baby kangaroo, yours is pink but mine is blue. Hers was small but ..."
b-nuts1: and cup will send the first one
Cuparius: Yeah!
DillardB-: cause Archibald knocks Larry over..
CCChloe: LOL!
MRSCPWOLF: okay i'm lost
b-nuts1: me too they on vegie tales
CCChloe: MRSCPWOLF: Veggietales..
Cuparius: Are we not all lost in the endless expanse of Space?
MRSCPWOLF: oh that's why
b-nuts1: true cup
DillardB-: I keep the Ninja Turtle that wears the red on my computer desk at all times..
CCChloe: Danger, Will robinson!!!
Cuparius: Just a dust mote on an arm of a lonely spiral galaxy...
CCChloe: I'M SIGNIFICANT! (cried the dust speck)
Cuparius: Drifting slowly through the Cosmos...
Cuparius: Toward...oblivion.
Cuparius: "Oh, to be the cream..."
Cuparius: "Hang on, Sloopy..."
CCChloe: I's astounding
CCChloe: time is fleeting
CCChloe: madness takes its toll
CCChloe: butlisten closely
CCChloe: not for very much longer
MRSCPWOLF: well i would love to stay and chat but it is late and i need to sleep while i can
CCChloe: I've got to - keep control
CCChloe: *GRINS*
MRSCPWOLF: oh rocky horror m favorite
Cuparius: LOL CCChloe!
b-nuts1: yes you do nite mrs and godbless and sweetdreams
CCChloe: I remmeber doing the time warp, drinking those moments when the blackness would hit me, and the void would be calling...
Cuparius: Ta'ra, MRSCPWOLF!
CCChloe: ni ni MRSCPWOLF
MRSCPWOLF: have a good night
*** MRSCPWOLF has left channel #Books-NetCafe
b-nuts1: afk
Cuparius: Did I tell you about the Case of the Baby Bottle of Absinthe?
CCChloe is a tired widdle puddy tat
CCChloe: Cuparius: No you didn't. Tell me, is it about as interesting as The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch?
Cuparius: Not really
CCChloe: oh... well.. tell it anyway
Cuparius: It's not very interesting at all, truth be told
Cuparius: Dillard, what's in your eye socket now?
DillardB-: Uhm..
DillardB- coughs..
DillardB-: Dr. Pepper..
b-nuts1: cup did you work today??????
CCChloe: LOL!
Cuparius: Och, nae
b-nuts1: good
b-nuts1: working tomorrow
Cuparius: Dr. Pepper in your eye socket?
Cuparius: Tomorrow, aye :(
DillardB-: It's the bubbling thing, I tell ya!
b-nuts1: awwwwwwwwwwwww
b-nuts1: did seq come in tonight
Cuparius: 'Tis a calamity, indeed, Dillard
Cuparius: I haven't seen her
b-nuts1: ty
Cuparius: Seq said she probably won't have phone service until the 26th...maybe
DillardB- drops his glass eye in the cup of water on the shelf..
CCChloe: oh wow
Cuparius: A remarkable work of craftsmanship, that eye of yours, Dillard
Cuparius admires the glass eye in the cup of water
CCChloe: A magnificent specimen, eh, Cup?
Cuparius: Truly
DillardB-: It is nice, isn't it?
Cuparius: Glorious
Cuparius: Must have been a highly skilled glassblower
b-nuts1: i
Cuparius: Dillard, I have a present for you...
b-nuts1: looks like in scrooged
DillardB-: Present???
Cuparius checks his coat pockets, his jacket pockets, his trouser pockets, and his waistcoat pockets...
Cuparius: Aha!
CCChloe: scrooged?
Cuparius: An extra prosthetic eye, or might I say, ocular substitute? For you.
b-nuts1: te movie was an eyeball in drink
CCChloe: oh MY
DillardB-: Neato!
Cuparius hands Dillard a jawbreaker
CCChloe: That was rather generou of you old chap :)
DillardB-: Ooo...
*** Samkae (Samkae@proxy1.talkcity.com) has joined channel #Books-NetCafe
CCChloe: hey Samkae! Welcome to the madness ;)
b-nuts1: hi sam
Cuparius: Hello, Samkae!
Samkae: Hi I couldn't get the line to type
Samkae: what doing?
Samkae: nothing I guess..LMAO
Cuparius: We were just admiring Dillard's fascinating glass eye, Samkae
Samkae: sounds like fun..I think? LOL
CCChloe: ROFL
CCChloe: Its marvellous fun!
b-nuts1: lol
Samkae: lol
Samkae: what color is the eye?
Samkae: can't see it from here
DillardB-: If you put a bunch of rubber bands around it, It will bounce..
Cuparius: He was savagely deprived of the original, organic orb by a fierce pigeon
Samkae: oh....sci fi huh?
Cuparius: Nope
CCChloe: ROFL DillardB-
Samkae: oops
Cuparius: Science Fact
CCChloe: DillardB-: I say, what entertainment!
Samkae: groovy group...lol
CCChloe: Samkae: Join in!
Samkae: Thanks
Samkae: where were you at when I came in?
Samkae: beside Dillards eye
CCChloe: rambling on...
Cuparius: Dillard, has anyone called you Cyclops? Do you hear that sort of thing often?
DillardB-: Actually.. No..
Cuparius: Ah. Good.
Samkae: hi Dillard
DillardB-: Although people don't like it when I look around a room..
CCChloe: I do believe that his drinking buddies call him "Old One Eye"
DillardB-: Because my glass eye just.. sits there.
b-nuts1: lol
Samkae: do you "glare" at ppl? lol
Cuparius: Have you thought about..."jazzing it up," Dillard, old boy?
b-nuts1: such as cup
DillardB-: My daughter, Shulie, paid a homeless man in fried chicken to talk to her class on parents day, once..
CCChloe: "Any wizard bright enough to survive for five minutes was also bright enough to realise that if there was any power in demonology, then it lay with the demons. Using it for your own purposes would be like trying to beat mice to death with a rattlesnake."
CCChloe: -- Why summoning demons is a Bad Idea
Cuparius: Well...such as...putting a little strobe light inside, or a tiny sparkler device?
b-nuts1: cute idea
DillardB-: On halloween, I paint it red and walk the streets, chasing little children
Cuparius: LOL CCChloe!
b-nuts1: lol
Cuparius: Very good, Dillard!
CCChloe: "Ankh-Morpork had dallied with many forms of government and had ended up with that form of democracy known as One Man, One Vote. The Patrician was the Man; he had the Vote."
CCChloe: -- Discworld politics explained
Cuparius: LOL
Samkae: I'm trying to follow this...LOL
--> DillardB- DillardB-: My daughter, Shulie, paid a homeless man in fried chicken to talk to her class on parents day, once..
CCChloe: Samkae: You don't need to LOL
--> DillardB- ROFL!!!!!
*DillardB-* lol
Samkae: tx thats gets tiring
CCChloe: I just like tossing out random quotes I found funny LOL
Samkae: you are good at it chloe
--> DillardB- Does CCChloe know who you *really* are yet?
*DillardB-* I don't know.. LOL
b-nuts1: nite ppl
Samkae: yes so far so good
Cuparius: Ta'ra (((((((((((((((((b-nuts)))))))))))))))))
b-nuts1: {{{{{{{{chloe}}}}}}}}}
DillardB-: Night, b-nuts!!
Samkae: nite nuts
b-nuts1: {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{cup}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
CCChloe: ni ni b-nuts1!
b-nuts1: other {{{{{{{{{{{{roomies}}}}}}}}}}}}
Samkae: b - good b- nuts
b-nuts1: godbless and sweetdreams
I'll keep posting if you keep reading. Be seeing you... :-?
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